What to pack for a hospital stay

The reason I haven't been blogging lately is that I was in hospital recently and then afterwards on holidays. I won't go into all the details but basically my doctor found a large cyst on my ovary and since we had planned to go on holidays to Greece the following week she said I should get it removed as otherwise there would be the risk of it bursting while I was away. It's normally done with a relatively minor keyhole surgery however in my case the operation ended up being a little more complicated and I needed an incision in my abdomen. Overall I was in hospital for 6 days recovering. It was a tough week for me as you can imagine!

The GerMann and I ended up having to miss the first few days of the holiday and get a later flight as I needed to wait for my stitches to be removed and until I felt up to travelling. We were meeting my family there and I was also really looking forward to seeing them. Despite not being able to do much on the holiday apart from reading and relaxing by the pool or beach, I still had a lovely time and was able to recover. Feeling back to normal again now and so much better!

Anyway I thought I'd put together a list of things to pack if you ever end up needing to go to hospital for a few days. Firstly, you may end up having to stay longer than anticipated so it's always a good idea to bring more stuff than you think you will need and pack for extra days just in case.

1) Pyjamas
Think comfortable and loose fitting. You will feel so much better once you can take off the hospital gown and get into your own pjs. I brought a navy polka-dot nightshirt with navy bottoms which I'd bought in Primark. One of the nurses commented that polka dots are very "in" at the moment, haha!

2) Face & hand cream, lip balm, hair comb, tootbrush & toothpaste, mini shampoo & conditioner
Just some essentials to help you feel a little normal and also to not scare your visitors too much! I personally think there is no need to wear makeup in hospital but if you would feel better with some on, then of course go ahead and pack it.

3) Plenty to read
Magazines are perfect as you don't need to concentrate on them when you are feeling tired after surgery and they are nice to just flick through. But also bring a few books along too, ideally ones that are easy to read and get into.

4) Paperwork
Don't forget things like your health insurance info, your normal GP's contact details, and anything that might be relevant- such as the names of antibiotics you might have been on recently or any medication you are taking. My German health insurance was very good, everything was pretty much covered. I only received a small bill afterwards of 10€ per day.

5) Your phone and charger
This was my lifeline! Being in hospital in Germany I felt a long way away from my family and friends from home. So it was great to be able to text and Whatsapp people and I even got a phonecall from Australia! I feel lucky to have such great friends and I was reminded of it again when I was hospital. The ones here gave me a lovely care package, I got sent flowers from a friend living abroad, and a box of irish treats (Cadbury chocolate, Tayto crisps, time out bars etc!) was sent over from Ireland. The GerMann was also in visiting me every free moment he wasn't working - keeping me company and looking after me.

6) Slippers, socks, underwear
Hospital floors are cold, so slippers are a must.

7) A comfortable outfit for going home
Tracksuit bottoms, trainers and a t-shit are perfect.

8) Some cash
You might need money to buy something in the hospital shop. Where I stayed you had to pay extra for bottled water and coffee.

So those are the main things. And anything else that might help cheer you up while you are in there! Like an mp3 player so you can listen to some music. Or a portable dvd player /crossword book /knitting etc. Have I forgotten anything important?

I was so happy once I was released from hospital after my stay there since I was so sick of those four walls at that stage. Once I got home the GerMann made me a lovely cup of Barry's Tea (well known irish tea brand for those who don't know) and then we caught up with the latest Game of Thrones episodes.

On my first blog post

I'm doing a blog link up! The theme is firsts (#firstsTOTALSOCIAL) and I thought I would share my initial blog post from nearly 4 years ago. From when I'd decided to move to Germany for "die große Liebe" (the great love!). Yep, I'm one of those expats who moved countries for love. Career wise it also wasn't a bad move for me luckily considering I was unemployed after coming back from travelling (one year in Australia). In the post I talk a little about our background story, how we got back together again despite breaking up a few years earlier when the long distance got too much.

Initially I thought I would move to Germany for awhile and just see how it goes, I wasn't thinking totally long term. It was a difficult year with a lot of ups and downs. After the initial "honeymoon phase" with the country passed I struggled for several months (also known as culture shock). I had a long commute, working in a foreign language was exhausting and life as an expat took some getting used to! I also lost my "suppose base"- family and friends from home. I had the GerMann of course which was great but I've always been very independent and didn't want to rely on him completely so I knew I also had a make a life for myself so I set about going to meetups and trying to make friends anyway possible (even if it meant arranging to meet total strangers off the internet!). And gradually I built up my friend group, improved my German and created a life for myself here.

Four years later and I'm glad I decided to take the leap of faith and make the move to Germany. The GerMann and I are happy newlyweds, I have a great job, circle of friends and despite occasional homesickness, I feel settled and happy and don't regret leaving Ireland 4 years ago!

You can read my first blog post here: Deciding to make the move

Things I learned from planning my wedding (in Dublin from Germany)

I've been meaning to write this post for awhile now to share some tips and advice I have from planning my wedding last year.

Firstly you should relax and enjoy the initial engagement phase for a few weeks, it's a fun time before you start thinking about the big task ahead of you and getting stressed!

1)Try to book the venue, band and photographer as soon as you can. These all get booked out the quickest! We were very disappointed that we didn't get our first choice of wedding band. I had emailed them to confirm they are free on our date but then we spent about a week thinking it over and when I wrote to them to actually book them, they had been booked by another couple in the meantime! So try to get these big things sorted first.

2) If people offer and are wiling to help, use their talents. When your friends offer to help then accept it, wedding planning is a big job so any help to share the work load is great! Think about what they are good at and ask them to help with a related task. For instance, I had a very creative friend who was great at graphic design who made wonderful table names for each table - each table I named after a place in Germany we had visited and she created table plans with photos of us visiting those places. Do as much as you can over email if you are living abroad and get your team of helpers on the ground to takeover some of the tasks for you since you can't possibly fly over for everything. I was very lucky that I had my family and bridesmaids helping out in Dublin, especially because I couldn't be there for everything. Pinterest is also a fun way to figure out your wedding vision and share photo and ideas with your bridesmaids.

3) Allow plenty of time for the invitations. Especially so people have a chance to book flights and plan ahead. We had a lot of guests flying over to the wedding from all over the world; Germany, the UK, Belgium, even Australia. I think we sent the invites out 6 weeks before the wedding but I should have sent them out ideally at least 8 weeks beforehand. And just start earlier than you might think. It easily takes several weeks between choosing your invite style, settling on the wording, proof reading, waiting for the invites to arrive, collecting everyone's address, and then writing and posting them.

4) Give your bridesmaids some guidelines on what sort of hen party you would like but otherwise leave it to them. The bride has so much to organize which means it's great when your bridesmaids or friends organize your hen party (or in my case parties) so that you have one less thing to worry about. Just give them an idea of what sort of party you'd like and what you'd hate! In my case I requested nothing too embarrassing! I also said that since I don't get to see my Irish friends very often I'd like to have a chance to chat and catch up with everyone- and being in a loud nightclub for instance wouldn't have worked.

5) Ask your married friends for advice - which suppliers did they use and who would they recommend, what tips can they share and so on? When you go to other people's weddings think about what works well, what you liked and what isn't your style. You loved the band? Then get their details from the couple. Close friends will also tell you about how much they paid for certain things which also helps give you an idea of what is good value.

6) Don't stress about all your guest having a good time. I was worried about the German guests mingling with the Irish and whether people would enjoy the wedding until several friends told me to just focus on enjoying the day myself and everyone can look after themselves. And they were right, in the end all the guests mixed without needing any introductions from me an it was a brilliant day.

7) Plan which photos you would like in advance and tell photographer. It's a good idea to give your photographer a list of your must have pictures. For instance if you would like a photo of different relations or one of just you and your bridesmaids. If you can get photos of yourself at the reception with some of the wedding guests it is lovely and a nice keepsake to send the guests a print later with the thank you notes. I didn't make it around to everyone unfortunately, and wish I had! I only managed to get photos with a few people.

8) Negotiate where possible and have a budget. Have an overall budget to keep track of the costs. We used an excel sheet and also had a column for who had been paid in advance and who needed to be paid on the day. Of course weddings are expensive and you won't be able to have everything you want so work out what's important to you. For instance we didn't hire a videographer so we had more money to spend on drinks for the guests. And in the end my cousin did a lovely video for us! There are some things you can negotiate somewhat such as the venue so it's definitely worth doing, or trying at least! Or if you use someone you know sometimes you can get a "friend discount". Every little helps!

9) Don't forget the groom. Haha! Get him involved and helping out with the areas important to him. I asked the GerMann early on which things in the wedding mattered to him the most. For him it was the food and music. So he researched possible bands, planned the playlist and had a lot of say in the menu. He was also in charge of the groomsmen, what they wore etc. I was able to choose other things that mattered more to me without interference, such as the bridesmaids dresses, what the wedding cake should look like and the flowers.

10) Importance of hair and make up trial. It's worth having an idea of what sort of hairstyle and make up look you would like and then bringing pictures with you to the trial. Sometimes something you think would suit you might actually not suit you at all which is also why it's great to have the trial! I tried out a hairstyle like the one on the left but I realised that it didn't really suit my face shape and looked too harsh. So in the end I went for a softer style with a side parting more like the picture on the right which suited my face shape more. If I hadn't have tried out various styles beforehand than I wouldn't have known what was right for me.

I also started getting facials regularly about 6 months before the wedding, increasing my water intake and making sure to always remove my makeup at night and these little things made a difference. You want to be looking and feeling your best on your wedding day- there will be a lot of photos!

11) Have the wedding you want. It's important to have the wedding that is right for you both as a couple and not to feel pressurised into having a wedding that you aren't comfortable with. This is important to bear in mind when choosing venue and guest number. For us we wanted to have a relatively small and intimate wedding so we only had 80 guests which was perfect as we got to speak to everyone at least once!

12) Start getting ready really early on the day. When your makeup artist and hair stylist tell you what time you should start getting ready at, it will probably seem very early but they know best! In my case I wish we had even had our appointment 15 minutes earlier as it ended up going over time which threw everything else off! I had imagined that in the house I would have had plenty of time to eat something, take photos and have chats with my bridesmaids but in the end it felt very rushed!

And finally have fun on the day!

Everyone says that the day itself flies by and to try to take it all in and enjoy it and they are right- it's a wonderful day, so take a second to enjoy it! Try to find some time where it's just you too. One of my favourite moments from the day was in the car after the church ceremony drinking champagne and having a chat with my new husband before we arrived at the wedding venue.

There are also some more tips here: planning a wedding in Ireland from abroad

Did I forget anything?

On changing my name after marriage

Well I've finally done it. It's official. I'm now Frau GerMann. As far as Germany is concerned the old me doesn't exist anymore. It took me ages to get around to it but it actually wasn't that difficult. It involved a trip to the local Bürgerbüro with the GerMann in tow and our paperwork- passport for both of us and marriage certificate. I also brought my birth cert but it wasn't needed in the end.

I've had awhile to get used to the name change as I changed it on facebook once we got back from the honeymoon and also at work so I didn't feel anxious about it until a brief second of panic when the lady told me I can never ever revert to my old name again unless through death or divorce. The two scary "D"s! However if I wish to change my name to a double barrel name at a later stage I can still do that. She also told me to sign the form using my maiden name for the very last time! The GerMann also had to sign, that he agreed to me taking his name. Or something like that. So then we walked out, me a new person! Now I just have to get used to saying the new name and signing it.

I should mention I thought long and hard about whether to take on my husband's name. To me my name is part of my identity and it's a little scary and strange to lose that. My whole life I've been known a certain way and belonged clearly to my family and taking on your husband's name also seems a little old fashioned. While I was thinking over the decision I even googled pros and cons! It didn't help that the GerMann said he didn't mind whether I took his name or not.

In the end though I decided to change my name for several reasons. The majority of my recently married friends changed their names, it's still the done thing these days. For our future kids I would like us all to have the same name, it's nice and shows unity. Also it's a German sounding name and I live in Germany- maybe it will also help me feel like I belong here more. And basically I couldn't think of any really good reason not to change!

How about you, would you change your name after marriage or have you already done so?

Dublin Easter break

Over Easter the GerMann and I went to Dublin for a week's trip. As usual I had a great time catching up with friends and spending time with my family. Homesickness always hits me strongly just after returning to Germany after trips back though - I tend to find the first few days settling into my German life again difficult. I asked some of my other expat friends about it and they all feel exactly the same. Wonder if it'll ever get easier! It's crazy to think I'll be living here 4 years this July. Doesn't really feel that long!

The one thing I do try to remind myself when bad homesickness hits is that visiting Dublin for a week's holiday is still a lot different to living there. Of course it's lovely checking out new restaurants with friends or relaxing with my family, or going on trips and not having to work or get up early - you are on the total holiday vibe. So you are seeing things through rose-tinted spectacles and in their best light basically. We were also incredibly lucky with the weather that week, it was perfect and sunny nearly every day. During the trip we were out and about most of the time. Some of the highlights: dinner in Gallagher's Bistro followed by drinks in The Long Stone pub, another night cocktails and dancing in Dakota, afternoon tea & cake in the Mellow Fig, a relaxed evening in Il Baccaro Temple Bar, walking Kiliney hill on a beautiful sunny day, scones in the Royal Marine hotel and a long liquid lunch at La Planca.

I'm really hoping this will be the year that more friends from home will visit us as I would love to show them around and go on trips here! Every time I met up with someone I emphasised that they are welcome to visit, that we have plenty of room in our apartment and that it's really lovely here in the Summertime with lots of fun things to do (beautiful lakes to swim in, beer gardens for the long warm evenings, visiting medieval castles...) and it normally stays nice well into October which is also a great time (Oktoberfest, wine tasting, cycle trips..). Everyone I mentioned it to seemed keen to visit and two friends have already started looking up flights and asking about possibly dates. My family are also planning to visit us this year. Can't wait! Had great laughs with my sister when we bought bought Dirnls and wore them to the Oktoberfest last year! The GerMann refused to wear lederhosen but maybe this time we can convince him!

Spring fever

"Frühjahrsmüdigkeit" is roughly translated as "spring fever" in English. However confusingly it has the opposite meaning! The English term implies increased energy at the start of spring whereas Germans talk about feeling tired for no reason apart from the fact that the season has changed. The weather has been strange these days. Still cold in the mornings, a mere 10 degrees but then it heats up in the afternoons when the sun comes out to a sunny 23 degrees.

I'm delighted winter is over but now spring is here I have had my hay fever to deal with. Luckily after just a few a difficult days I managed to get it under control- taking a tablet every night. It should be gone in a few more weeks.

There's a 6km marathon the end of May which I've signed up for. This way I have the motivation to take jogging up again. And I felt great after completing the 5km run last year. People who regularly take part in proper marathons will probably be laughing reading this as very fit people don't have to train at all to do a 5km run. But over winter I haven't been doing much exercise so I'll have to build up my fitness level again slowly. I like the couch to 5k running plan.

I've never been one of those people who is obsessed with running unfortunately. They seem to love it and get a real high and miss it if they don't do it. I find it a struggle and feel happy once it's over! Once you decide to start jogging, the first few times you go are really difficult and you just feel like giving up and wonder what crazy thing gave you the idea to go running. But after a few times, it suddenly starts to get better and you find you can jog for longer and get into a stride. From then on it's possible to go for a little longer each time.

So I'm planning to go jogging, ideally one or two evenings after work and at the weekend. I use an app on my phone, called "Endomondo" to track my distance. There are also some lovely routes not too far from where I live so I don't have to jog beside a busy road but can enjoy some nature. Maybe if I do more exercise my "Frühujahrsmüdigkeit" will turn into "spring fever" and I'll be jumping out of bed in the mornings! Here's hoping.

Paddy's day - the usual madness

This year's St. Patrick's day was probably the best I've had since I've been living in Germany. Unfortunately it fell on a Monday this year but I didn't let that stop me from celebrating and took a half day from work. The weather was fantastic, a sunny 20 degrees. Better weather than they were having in Dublin that day ( I checked!).

Standing outside one of the local Irish pubs drinking Guinness with some friends was perfect. Having lived here nearly four years at this stage I know a lot of people and feel more relaxed and at home in general. I was also able to chat away in German to some German friends who came without struggling to find the correct words or follow the conversation.

The few days leading up to Paddy's day I was starting to feel a little homesick though, seeing my Irish friend's facebook pages. And also this video:

I love the generation emigration section of the Irish Times. It makes me feel like I'm part of something bigger- one of many many Irish people who have emigrated and are living abroad and trying to find our way in a new county, while still holding on to our cultural identity. My American friend at work commented that my Irish accent sounded particularly strong the days leading up to Paddy's day which was funny. I also painted my nails bright green, because why the hell not!

How did you celebrate St. Patrick's day?

Weihnachtsstimmung

At the beginning of December my German teacher asked me it I have any "Weihnachtsstimmung" (Christmas spirit). She asked if I have baked any Plätzchen (German Christmas biscuits), bought presents, put up decorations or written Christmas cards. I had done none of it! Despite Christmas somehow starting earlier and earlier each year, even before Halloween, I still always feel like it sneaks up on me and then in the week before Christmas or even the day before, I often find myself running around the shops picking up last minute presents or hurriedly writing cards. Stress! I have also one year ordered gifts online too late so that they didn't end up arriving until a few days AFTER the big day- oh dear.

This time around I managed to be a bit more organized however and sent out a batch of Christmas cards once I had finished writing the wedding thank you cards and bought my presents with time to spare. I didn't end up putting up the tree this time though since we weren't going to be in the apartment for Christmas, so our place certainly lacked holiday spirit. However I think we made up for it by eating three Christmas dinners! How did that happen? Well we spent the 24th with the GerMann's family, the 25th attending our friends' dinner party and my family also did a sort of belated Christmas day for us when we got to Ireland. Lucky us!

Traditions in Germany are a quite different to back in Ireland. On the 6th of December, you are meant to clean your shoes and leave them out and Nikolaus then puts little presents in them. My lovely mother in law visited us and brought lots of chocolate goodies and santa themed tea towels.

Having enjoyed several Glüweins at the christmas market, gone ice skating, xmas shopping, had my office christmas party, received and sent xmas cards and listened to some xmas music I can now say that I experienced plenty of 'Weihnachtsstimmung'. One of the best things about Germany has to be the Christmas markets. Nothing beats meeting up with a few friends over a mulled wine (Glüwein) and if feeling up to it, ice skating afterwards.

This past year was my first German Christmas which meant it was celebrated on December 24th, instead of the 25th. And there was no turkey. Instead we had fish, though goose is also common. There were a lot of similarities nonetheless- mass, overeating, Christmas tree and exchanging gifts. After our dinner on the 24th we had to momentarily leave the room, and a little bell was rung which meant the "Christkind" was there and had left us presents. This is instead of Santa Claus.

It was a nice to learn about new traditions and to spend time with my German family! Then the GerMann and I spent a week in Dublin where we had a really great time as always! We are hoping to travel to Ireland more often this year.

Hope everyone had a lovely Christmas!