Saturday, May 10, 2014
On changing my name after marriage
Well I've finally done it. It's official. I'm now Frau GerMann. As far as Germany is concerned the old me doesn't exist anymore. It took me ages to get around to it but it actually wasn't that difficult. It involved a trip to the local Bürgerbüro with the GerMann in tow and our paperwork- passport for both of us and marriage certificate. I also brought my birth cert but it wasn't needed in the end.
I've had awhile to get used to the name change as I changed it on facebook once we got back from the honeymoon and also at work so I didn't feel anxious about it until a brief second of panic when the lady told me I can never ever revert to my old name again unless through death or divorce. The two scary "D"s! However if I wish to change my name to a double barrel name at a later stage I can still do that. She also told me to sign the form using my maiden name for the very last time! The GerMann also had to sign, that he agreed to me taking his name. Or something like that. So then we walked out, me a new person! Now I just have to get used to saying the new name and signing it.
I should mention I thought long and hard about whether to take on my husband's name. To me my name is part of my identity and it's a little scary and strange to lose that. My whole life I've been known a certain way and belonged clearly to my family and taking on your husband's name also seems a little old fashioned. While I was thinking over the decision I even googled pros and cons! It didn't help that the GerMann said he didn't mind whether I took his name or not.
In the end though I decided to change my name for several reasons. The majority of my recently married friends changed their names, it's still the done thing these days. For our future kids I would like us all to have the same name, it's nice and shows unity. Also it's a German sounding name and I live in Germany- maybe it will also help me feel like I belong here more. And basically I couldn't think of any really good reason not to change!
How about you, would you change your name after marriage or have you already done so?
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I changed my name when I got married. It's still a foreign name so it didn't help me that much in Ireland, I even get slagged about it because it sounds like " can of beer"... Contrary to Germany, France recognises the maiden name before the married name. On my ID, it basically says Anne Guiziou, spouse Canaveera (if that makes sense). I goes only by my married name in Ireland though, it's hard enough as it is, people would just get confused!!!
ReplyDeleteyes, they are both lovely but unusual sounding names for Ireland! I guess 'can of beer' helps people remember the name ;-)
DeleteI'm from Italy and I married a Northern Irish man, but we live in Scotland :) I could have chosen to change my name, as girls do over here, but I didn't...In Italy we keep our name and I love mine, and even though it makes my life soooo complicated (Federica Gallerani...how do u spell that?!? ;)) it's a slice of my identity I don't want to give up :)
ReplyDeleteThat's a lovely and very Italian sounding name! I didn't realise that in Italy women keep their names after marriage. Giving up my surname was like losing a part of my identity and I did struggle with it a bit!
DeleteHi Dublin Gal,
ReplyDeleteI just stumbled on your blog yesterday via expat-blog.com and enjoyed reading about your love story and life in Germany. I too moved to Germany for 'die große Liebe' and live in Baden-Württemberg with my German husband.
I was interested to read about changing your name after marriage in Germany. It's something I've been thinking about for a while since we got married in April. We also went to the local Landratsamt and they said it would be a straightforward process to take my husband's last name. My question is: did you have to change your last name on any of your other documents prior (ex. passport or Aufenthaltserlaubnis)? I'm wondering what order to change all the documents. My research so far tells me with will be very expensive and time consuming.
Thanks for your advice!
Your fellow expat,
Meredith
Hi Meredith, thanks for your comments! I'm enjoying your blog now too :) No I didn't need to change my name anywhere else before going to the local Standesamt. They gave me a document there saying my name was officially changed and then you just need to give copies of that document to other places (bank, passport etc). The Standesamt updated their records so that the Finanzamt would have my new name. I don't actually need an Aufenthaltseraubnis since I'm in the EU so not sure what the protocol is for that. And my passport doesn't expire for another year so thinking about just changing it then
DeleteThanks for your reply and for checking out my blog!
DeleteMy passport doesn't expire for 3 more years so I'm not sure if I should apply for a new passport now or wait until then to change my name. The prices went up a ton over the last couple of years, but I'm wondering if I should just take care of it now. Decisions, decisions...
grt
ReplyDeleteKarlu
ReplyDeleteIm a man and am.marrried to a German sweet lady now I want to change my name to her surname. many says don't but I like to bear her surname because I. live in germany name and want to feel German. she is not forcing. me on that but I voluntarily love to bear her name. any opinion on that pls? a.Man changing his name to.his wife.